the truth will set you free

Well, after 9 months of playing leapfrog at payday loan places, I finally fessed up to my family and told them what was going on. Angels that they are, they paid off the loans, zeroed out my past due bills and gave me a fresh start. I have handed over control of things to my hubby, which is a first for me and him. But I think it will be better all around that way. Here's to a New Year!

another restless night

yet another crappy night's sleep. financial worries do that to me, then i get acid indigestion so bad when i wake up i have to barf. just for one whole year, i would like to not have to think about finding money to pay debts. people from work treated me to lunch yesterday, which was nice, i'll return the favor someday. promised the girls they could go to work with me today, so i guess i'd better take them, even though i have tons of stuff to take care of.

i suppose i should buck up and remember lots of folks have it worse than me in this world. hope, always hope and prayer.

good times ,bad times

Damn I hate those payday loan places. I guess it is my fault since I chose to use one over 3 months ago. I have yet to get out from under that stupid mistake and now I am deeper in this friggin hole than I've ever been. Hopin for a miracle here soon. I swore when I watched my brother dying of cancer and I realized all the money in the world couldn't save him, that money would not keep control of my life. But somehow, when you don't have any, it ruins everything you try to enjoy. The main thing that ticks me off is I'd be better off if I didn't work. Then the government and charities would pay my rent, buy my food, fix what teeth haven't fallen out of mine and my husbands heads, pay for my doctor's visits (what's a doctor) and the food banks would give me a lovely holiday meal. Ah, pride. And hope. Always hope and pray.
Since I'm not a regular blogger I will tag myself.

10 years ago, I was living in a 3 bedroom house for 108 bucks a month, my car was paid for. Both of my first dogs were still alive and it was my first Christmas as a married woman.

5 years ago - I spent my first Christmas without my parents since they both died in the spring.

Last year- was waiting on my husband hand and foot since he fell off the roof and couldn't walk.

Yesterday- trying desperately to get a loan and getting rejected

(tying to remember how this goes)
5 things I enjoy doing

singing karaoke
watching my dogs play
being on the internet
laughing, since it doesn't occur often
making other people smile

5 foods I like (or something like that)
baked potatoes
goetta
grilled cheese
tomatoes with mayo
choclate pudding

5 things I know by heart

my ssn
my hubby's ssn
my msn password
the words to "Passionate Kisses" and quite a few other songs
the alarm code at work

hmmmm can't think of anything else that's supposed to go here.

oh yeah- what I would do if I had money
sleep at night
get my teeth fixed
live in a cabin in the mountains
start a foundation so kids can appreciate nature and playing outdoors like I did when I was young
meet people I know from the internet face to face

places I'd like to visit
New Zealand
Costa Rica
Hawaii
Key West
Carlsbad Caverns

5 TV shows I enjoy

The Simpsons
My Name is Earl
Survivor
CSI (the original one)
Jeopardy

I think I got it all now.
And I feell a tiny bit better now.